This weekend I turn 29. To some women, they would be FREAKING OUT if single and alone at this age. But for me, I am stepping back to smell the tulips, dance to JT and not afraid to ask a table for one.
2018 has been a realization learning for myself of how happy I am loving who I am, being my own fan and being independent!
I grew up with the culture of setting a life plan; get an education, get married and have kids. I didn’t know anything else. I would say to myself, “I have bad timing with guys” when it didn’t work out. But when I look back now, it was a sign he wasn’t right and/or I wasn’t ready (thank you signs). The truth is, I didn’t fully appreciate myself. Also, I was still learning who I want to be and what I want to do in life (to be honest, I’m still figuring this out). Our ego can also damage us to not be accepting of who we really are – it can be the false self that leads us in to making excuses to put us down (I’m not as pretty, I’m not as funny, I’m not thin enough). Thank you the “You are a Badass” book for letting me kick my ego’s butt.
Now, I put myself in check of how truly powerful I am! What pushes me to do more and be happily independent is being my own die hard fan. I feel happy looking at myself and for instance, appreciating I got my ass up at 6:00am to conquer a workout class (not every day but when I can!).
I am truly independent and make all of my own choices, because it’s just me (and I like it for now). There are still so many practices I want to build on my self happiness, morning meditation being one. Working on being the best me, I now have no expectation in my life on when I’ll find love, no desire to waste time searching or to rush finding it. The awesome thing is, I already have so much love with family and friends in my life.
Affirmations of these thoughts are key in my everyday life practice because there will be those moments again where I watch Pretty Woman or Say Anything and get down not having my knight sweep me off my feet in a limo or on a lawn mower. BUT I’ll snap into gear – because there is only one of me and I’m pretty damn awesome. Someday, someone truly worthy will see it too.
Here’s to the time of my independent life! Mr. Someone is out there and we’ll meet eventually. Cheers!
Your single and independent gal,